Archive for the Odds not ends category

23:09 and the man you never heard of

I do not want to be reflect­ive any more Envy­ing and des­pising unre­flect­ive things Find­ing pathos in dogs and undeveloped hand­writ­ing I read my first Louis Macneice poem in 1989, thanks to dis­cov­er­ing one of his col­lec­tions in the Sixth Form lib­rary when I was sup­posed to be revis­ing for my A-levels. I loathed the […]

02:51 and scratching the ceiling

Telling everything to fuck off. No, I’m not fas­cin­at­ing. Not a bit of it. If you believe that then please, I insist, come and live inside my body and my mind and see how long it takes before you’re dig­ging into walls, face, eyes and skin, revol­ted by the sheer men­tal tedi­um of it, the […]


Do you check your­self daily for evid­ence? For signs? Fin­ger­nail scrap­ings, a single stray hair, a micro­scop­ic drop of blood? I do.

Uneasy hush

Most right-minded people would prob­ably regard it as a pos­it­ive devel­op­ment that I don’t seem to have talked to myself for about a week. Apart from work phone calls and the occa­sion­al deliv­ery, I’ve been almost silent. Nat­ur­ally, then, I con­sider this to be a very bad sign indeed.

Informed / deformed

Dis­reg­ard everything you might have read in the pre­vi­ous entry, pub­lished just over a month ago. That’s an order. If you didn’t read it, don’t start now. Avoid, avoid, avoid. This site is still as good (bad) as dormant. Go and watch some­thing on You­tube instead. These days and nights, dusks and late morn­ings and […]

What? No, this isn’t here, just go away

A few nights ago, I had the thought to write some­thing here. I almost fol­lowed up on that thought too, but then sense forced its vice-like grip around my neck and began squeez­ing the air out of my lungs in sharp bursts. At that point, I shelved the ridicu­lous idea. Sense, how­ever, is clearly out […]

2012 Predictions #273

For­get social net­work­ing. It’s SO 2011. So last year (once this year becomes next year, that is, though it’s quite last year even while we’re still in this year). Social net­work­ing is OVER. It’s more over than a flipped pan­cake.* My pre­dic­tion is that blog­ging is going to be BIG in 2012. Like, REALLY BIG. […]

Blogging as therapy #1

In this new — and God help you all, let’s hope mer­ci­fuily short — series of posts, I am seek­ing to shake, punch and kick some life into the dis­eased, fet­id corpse of blog­ging by hark­ing back to the medium’s golden age. When blog­ging used to be about the tedi­ous minu­ti­ae of one’s life. When […]


Do make say think

I want to be a blog­ger. [Pause for effect.] Yes, you heard. Let me cla­ri­fy that gran­di­ose and pos­sibly fool­hardy state­ment. I want to be a nor­mal blog­ger. No, really, I do. I want to post long-win­ded entries about my day at work, about get­ting so drunk last night that, like, I don’t even remem­ber […]

One moment of excitable inhalation

I can barely believe what just happened! Indeed, I can so barely believe it that I am using exclam­a­tion marks in a flag­rant and down­right wil­ful fash­ion! Without due regard for health and safety laws! I have rarely been so anim­ated! Or excit­able! Where was I? Oh yes. What just happened, and barely believ­ing it. […]

Conversation v1.1

There’s some­thing I need to tell you.          [Insert mean­ing­less psy­chobabble here]                   “Where was I?” There are many things I want to tell you.          [Insert fleet­ing real­isa­tion here]                   “What was I going on about?” There are so many things I have to share.          [Insert stum­bling explan­a­tions here]                   “How did we even get onto this sub­ject?” But […]

Some words of enti(t)lement

Whilst it is indeed true that I do own an extremely well-thumbed thesaur­us, when indul­ging in yet anoth­er game of Scrabble I have also found that it greatly assists me in main­tain­ing a win­ning rack of let­ters to think of the writ­ten inspir­a­tion provided by a select few per­son­al pub­lish­ing web­sites (or ‘blogs’, as I […]

Buzz buzz in the eardrum

If I had ever thought to lie awake at night and pon­der what a fly might sound like when heard from a dis­tance of approx­im­ately ten thou­sand miles away, I would have just received my answer. It sounds buzzy. There. In fact, it sounds almost exactly like a fly does if it is buzz­ing right […]