23:36 and still here

I’m try­ing hard — though fail­ing — to fight all the demons tonight: the demons of utter loneli­ness, the demons of abject fail­ure, the scream­ing demons inside my head and the domains without (the noise, the fuck­ing noise, the traffic and the damned sirens).

I feel ashamed, even child­ish
When, as now, as tonight
I simply crave love and warmth
The thought of hold­ing a companion’s hand
Just that, noth­ing more

Grow up. Fuck­ing well grow up
Get some strength, weak, feeble creature
Miser­able, piti­ful cunt

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