Envy is too kind a word, too soft and poetic a word. It doesn’t convey the full strength of what I’ve experienced today. Or the full horror of the distaste I feel for myself.
For today I’ve been overwhelmed, riddled, infested and scarred by jealousy. It’s filled me to the brim, to the extent where I’ve wanted to tear and gouge at myself to release the poison.
I haven’t. But I can’t deny it’s been close.
Jealous, ungrateful, vile, despicable cunt. He should be put out for torture, he really should. Hateful, putrid insect.